bareks journey through life

I often had starts and fits in terms of writing in my journal or keeping up on the journal. I do when I look back reflect on the fact that the period of the 68 to when I started law school in 76 was perhaps the most creative. My life. Soon thereafter it changed. I don't know if it was due to law school which crushed creativity or being married so I the romantic ups and downs were down with or just life in general that became too real and therefore escaping the fantasy was harder and harder. The summer of 69 was the greatest it was one of the greatest if not the greatest summer of my life it's a period where I most grew and changed to what I was for the high school college years and perhaps for the rest of my life. I grew in so many ways and became much more rule I was ultimately to become. I was away from high school and sorge and therefore could develop on my own. I often felt camps a great place to change and grow away from the expectations or the social pressures in one'...

Tuesday July 30th 1968 missed chance at girl. Walked her back but that's it. Got better look in the morning Wednesday July 31st 1968 nothing of importance New kids bad news Thursday August 1st 1968 should have tried harder for Robin with her at movie but didn't walk back because of rain Friday August 2nd messed up jaffe the counselors bunk got screwed for it. Should try for Rob but no desire. Service is bad Saturday August 3rd 1968 last co-op election elected bunk chairman Jeff and Glenn had talked with Matt they may be sent home Matt reminds me of Johnson no credibility he once said quote what his fear is fair what is not fair is not fair brilliant statement from our leader. parentheses Matt was the head of the camp where Ron was the head counselor and the parenthesis P Sunday August 4th 1968 find a $1.40 in town council we voted the waiters out of one of their nights. Parentheses this was just means spirited and I regreted it and following years The waiters or counselors and ...

I am writing a bit out of sequence. I went to TAC  at the end of my sophomore year of high school. I believe the camp experiences very much changed me, whether for the good or bad would depend on how one views it. I changed a lot there and what I loved is it allowed me to change. I think prior to that I was very introverted and very unsure of myself. I became much more confident and perhaps much more egotistical. I became much closer with sorge  and osstroff less friendly with kaminski Paul Fisher. I always think of those are some of my better summers and loved my summers at camp. That  and my junior year abroad were to some of my favorite memories. Reading about it brings back very good memories. I wasn't writing that extensively and it was mostly just a paragraph per day. Monday July 1st 1968 -got home 1:00 a.m. so written at 2:00 a.m. decided to tell arrangements for July leaving for camp. So unable to keep up diary. Given synopsis when got back so tell  Then in d...

So I have been off and on but fairly consistently keeping a journal since 1968 or when it was first encountering teenage life and going through various thought processes. I'm unclear exactly why I start doing a journal. I don't know if it was ego or pretensions of being a literary presence. It might have just that I needed then just as I still do now a forum to vent and carry on and let things out. I found that the act of writing often would relieve the stress that allow me to move forward leaving the burdens anxiety problems on paper. I have reread the journals at different points and often find them interesting sometimes depressing and raises many questions about the choices I've made in life the different paths that could have been taken and then the fact that much of what was going on over 50 years ago is still going on today in terms of the ups and downs the uncertainties the silliness and stupidities. I cringe when I read some of my earlier writings and see how politi...